Identity Itself
Dec. 6th, 2022 08:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
innerstoryI've really struggled to define, to quantify my experience over the more than two years of pandemic life. I now believe that this is due to not realizing my experience has fractured my own view of my identity itself. Sometime after March 2020 my view of myself became lost and so did I.
I clearly remember of 40th birthday, which took place right before the initial rounds of shutdowns occurred. It feels like a lifetime ago, but more importantly I see very little of that person in me anymore. The bigger questions now are: Is that person still there but just buried or is that person gone? Would I even want that person back? What do I pivot too next if I don't go back because what is happening now is unsustainable?
Its a big problem, one I have been too afraid to explore. But, now I realize I am only hurting myself by not working through it.
I clearly remember of 40th birthday, which took place right before the initial rounds of shutdowns occurred. It feels like a lifetime ago, but more importantly I see very little of that person in me anymore. The bigger questions now are: Is that person still there but just buried or is that person gone? Would I even want that person back? What do I pivot too next if I don't go back because what is happening now is unsustainable?
Its a big problem, one I have been too afraid to explore. But, now I realize I am only hurting myself by not working through it.
